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***** WELCOME TO OTPCHARGERS.COM! *****
Welcome to the website of legendary cricket side, the OTP Chargers!! We are the longest running One Day team at Cornwall Cricket Club in Auckland, New Zealand, having first represented the club in 1997. We have won one championship ( 2001-02) and been losing finalists on three occasions ( 1999-2000, 2005-06 and 2006-07). 2010-11 will be our fourteenth consecutive season in Auckland Club Cricket. While we strive for glory on the cricket pitch, we make a point of enjoying ourselves off it. The Chargers may not always win on the cricket field, but they always emerge victorious from after-match celebrations at the Cornwall clubrooms!! To enjoy the website to its fullest, you should register as a user. This will allow you to post in the forums and contribute articles for publication here on the main page. Please note that all new members will have 'read only' access to this website until a moderator verifies their account. |
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Mr_Booze
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July Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Rain, rain, go away....a very wet last few weeks has failed to dampen the spirits of the staff here at otpchargers.com. Yet another action-packed month awaits our avid fans (all four of you).
Like an irritating fungal infection, Jim Dawson refuses to go away and instead returns with another directionless 'Jim Says What He Says'. In it, he discusses a few juicy tidbits of Cornwall gossip, as well as reliving of the glories and disasters of past OTP finals appearances.
Guest writer, Leon Vainu, has penned a great 'Classic Match' this month. We revisit the scene of a long-awaited win over the old foe, Mt Wellington, at their home ground earlier this year.
The late entrant for this month’s edition of ‘Spotlight On....’ is OTP stalwart, Chris ‘Hammer’ Whyte. Make sure you check this out around the middle of the month – some of his answers are simply hilarious!
The new season is one month closer. Rejoice!
GTC."
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Posted by on (5 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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June Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Tumbleweeds....followed by more tumbleweeds....followed by more tumblewee - well, you get the idea. Things are mighty quiet on the OTP Chargers front at the moment, but that hasn't stopped the dedicated staff at otpchargers.com from churning out some awesome stuff. AWESOME stuff, I tells ya!
Fat man, Jim Dawson, kicks things off with another entertaining edition of 'Jim Says What He Says'. In this month's column, the OTP skipper looks at the batsmen with the worst single-season batting averages. I bet a few of you are sweating on whether or not you're in it.
Classic Match guest writer, Shaun Pulman, has penned a superb reimagining of our semi-final defeat against Papatoetoe White from 2008. In his version of the game, the Chargers win by ten wickets and every batsmen gets a century! Magnificent stuff.
Cornwall Deputy Club Captain, Sean McWilliams, will be the focus of this month's 'Spotlight On....' column, coming later in the month. He discusses his five-season career with the OTP Chargers, as well as his plans to assassinate Tim Wilson and once again regain the Cornwall Club Captaincy in 2010-11. Cue evil laughter.
GTC."
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Posted by on (19 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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May Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "That's it. 2009-10 is done and dusted. Cornwall Prizegiving and the OTP End of Season Bash capped off what was another excellent season for the Chargers, despite the fact we didn't get our hands on that elusive 2A Trophy.
The latest edition of 'Jim Says What He Says' is out. But not in a gay way. Although you might think that after reading some of the airy-fairy drivel this guy writes. Stephen Jones, he most certainly is not.
Due to a torrent of fan emails, the brain-explodingly popular 'Classic Match' feature returns for the 2010 off-season. This month, we take a look at a game full of cheating so blatantly obvious that it was actually quite funny. Click here to be magically transported back to 2004 and a wet afternoon at Glover Park.
'Spotlight On....' also returns this month. The other half of the legendary Orewa Connection, Karney Dawson, is the first to field the usual array of mentally taxing questions about his time with the OTP Chargers. Keep an eye out for it mid-month.
2010-11 is a long, long way away. So strap yourselves in, keep your browser address bar thing locked in to otpchargers.com, make sure the fridge is stocked full of piss, and pass the time by looking at every single post on this website. There's some quite good stuff in there. Honestly.
GTC."
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Posted by on (29 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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April Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Champions? Well, not quite. :(
Despite two commanding wins in the Top Four last month, the OTP Chargers narrowly failed in their quest to make the One Day 2A final. It was a slightly surreal way to go out, as perhaps the form team of the competition.
The verbal diarrhoea of Jim Dawson has once again been smeared upon this fine, upstanding website in the form of April's 'Jim Says What He Says'. As usual, it stinks the joint up big time.
Cornwall Prizegiving and the OTP End of Season Bash round out the thirteenth chapter of the Chargers' story. While the ending to the season on the field may have been somewhat bittersweet, there is no doubt that the team will go out on a high in Hamilton.
GTC."
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Posted by on (29 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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March Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "February. Bad.
After four losses in a row, the OTP Chargers now find themselves fighting to stay alive in the hunt for the One Day 2A Championship. They are in the unenviable position of both having to win their remaining two Top Four games and having other results go their way.
Jim Dawson, who really is a grumpy old sod when he loses, has miraculously found time in his busy schedule to pen yet another eagerly awaited 'Jim Says What He Says'. In it, he gives details of who he is going to punch if the Chargers lose another game this season.
Let's make sure the title of next month's update is 'March. Champions'.
I dare you."
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Posted by on (34 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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February Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "The first month of the new year has been a productive one for the OTP Chargers, with three commanding wins from three starts. With just three games left in the Round Robin (all against the other Top Four teams), the challenge now will be to finish at the top of the table - which would be an unprecedented achievement in OTP history.
With his outlandishly long Summer holiday finally at an end, you would have thought that Jim Dawson might have found something better to do with his time apart from spending it sitting in front of a computer typing a silly little column that no-one reads. Apparently not.
The next month will be a good indicator of whether or not the Chargers are true title contenders this season. Big performances will be required from the entire squad.
Let's do this.
GTC."
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Posted by on (38 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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January Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Happy New Year from everyone here at otpchargers.com! 2010 arrives with the OTP Chargers nestled comfortably in the Top Four. Task #1 over the next two months is to stay there and task #2 is to try and cement a top two spot, thereby ensuring two ‘home’ games in the Top Four.
Even though he is holidaying in Melbourne at present, where he has been labelled a ‘cricket tragic’ by some locals, cricket tragic, Jim Dawson, has still found time to pen an almost 1,500-word edition of ‘Jim Says What He Says’ in time for the New Year. Cricket tragic? You be the judge.
The Drive for 100 dominates the opening week of January, before the One Day 2A competition resumes in the middle of the month. Business time is at hand.
GTC."
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Posted by on (2104 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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December Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "It has been a blistering start to the 2009-10 One Day 2A competition by the OTP Chargers. A couple of demolition jobs against Birkenhead and Mt Wellington have been accompanied by two gutsy wins over Eden Roskill Punjabi XI and Auckland Cricket Society. The team's solitary loss came last weekend against Eden Roskill White, a side that looks destined to be in the thick of things at the business end of the competition.
OTP captain, Jim Dawson, has not yet submitted his latest edition of 'Jim Says What He Says'. Although he has stated that work commitments have prevented him from completing this column, otpchargers.com thinks his lack of commitment is nothing short of appalling and has fined him $7. EDIT: It's finally here, but really, it wasn't worth the wait. If you're having trouble sleeping at night, click here, press 'print', keep what comes out by your bedside and that insomnia will become yesterday's problem. You're welcome.
Three games until Christmas and two of them are against Top Four sides. A return to winning ways will ensure a place in the Top Four is all but secure by the Christmas break.
Ho ho ho.
GTC."
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Posted by on (2176 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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November Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Finally....the 2009-10 cricket season is here! Despite our pre-season games not really going to plan (a complete washout against Mainstream, the loss of the ‘Trophy of Smut’ to the Rockafellas and a soggy encounter against the CTs), the team came out all guns blazing on the first Saturday of the competition against Birkenhead.
Local simpleton, Jim Dawson, has contributed another bunch of words in his latest ‘Jim Says What He Says’. Some of them are English, some are not. One thing is certain – none of them make any sense whatsoever.
The standard on the field has now been set. The key between now and Christmas will be maintaining it.
GTC."
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Posted by on (2247 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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October Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "We are down to a matter of days until the commencement of the 2009-10 season. Cornwall Mainstream is first on the menu and the Chargers will be hoping to demolish their appetiser, before embarking on the main course that is the One Day 2A championship.
Jim Dawson has wasted the best part of his school holidays by locking himself in a cupboard and penning another insignificant column about something or other. I got bored after the first few words and went off to make a sandwich. Ham and cheese. It was rather nice. Uhhh....what were we talking about?
This month’s Classic Match has been penned by Steve Martin. Get ready for craziness. No, really. Get ready for craziness.
Later this month, the final instalment of our stupendously popular ‘Spotlight On....’ column will feature none other than OTP wild child, Greg Laws. Both the Classic Match and Spotlight On features now take a break and will magically reappear in May 2010.
The time for talk is at an end. Now is the time for action.
Lock and load."
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Posted by on (57 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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September Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Just one month to go until the 2009-10 season kicks off and the excitement levels are palm-sweatingly palpable. The first pre-season fixture against Cornwall Mainstream is a rematch that has been anticipated keenly for nigh on a year now and the Chargers will be out to both make amends and shut mouths after last year’s loss.
Wild-eyed loon, Jim Dawson, is back with another misguided attempt at what he likes to call his ‘ongoing interview process’ with Cricinfo, as he seeks a position as one of their regular contributors. The best bit of advice that we at otpchargers.com can offer him is, “Stick to the pies and sweets, fatty.”
This month’s Classic Match delves into the very recent past and revisits the inaugural Battle of the Ages from earlier this year. A cracker of a game that set the scene for what now looks to be a traditional fixture on the OTP calendar.
The ball-bustingly popular ‘Spotlight On....’ feature also returns later in the month, as OTP legend, Graham McCartain, shares his thoughts on his eleven seasons with the OTP Chargers.
Not since 2008-09 has a new cricket season been more eagerly anticipated. So start your engines - the final countdown has begun.
GTC."
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Posted by on (2085 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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August Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "The big news of the last few days has undoubtedly been the sudden demise of the Cornwall NBLs. The iconic Cornwall team has been disbanded just over two months out from the start of the new season and the Chargers have reaped some serious benefits. New OTP faces in Darren Wind and Laurie McIntosh will be joined by the returning Iain ‘Bruiser’ Taylor for the 2009-10 season. Massive.
Jim Dawson’s latest column is little more than an obsequious attempt at currying favour with the new players, as he waxes lyrical about the various qualities they will bring to the Chargers. His planned column, which was to focus on opposition players with the best records against the Chargers, will have to wait until next month. I know, I know....it’s devastating news for the millions upon millions of OTP fans whose only joy in life is reading this column each month.
This month’s Classic Match pays homage to the NBLs as we revisit the first-ever meeting of the OTP Chargers and the NBLs, way back in January 1999 – an epic battle that went right down to the final over.
Keep an eye out for our colossally popular ‘Spotlight On....’ feature later this month – one of the most memorable players to have ever donned an OTP shirt, Glenn Satherley, will share his thoughts on his time with the Chargers.
I feel a renewed excitement about 2009-10. Let’s get this party started.
GO THE CHARGERS!!"
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Posted by on (56 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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July Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "It is perhaps the quietest time of the year for Southern Hemisphere cricketers. While our Northern counterparts bask in glorious days filled with cloud, light drizzle and varying degrees of smog-filtered sunshine, most people in this part of the world are stuck inside, listening to the wind, rain, hail and thunder, all the while feverishly counting down the days until Summer is upon us again by making tally marks on the wall in their own blood....ahem. Enough of my private life.
The dedicated staff at otpchargers.com will not have their spirits dampened however, and they have put together the usual assortment of monthly updates. As usual, JSWHS is bound to stir up some lively debate, with the OTP skipper this month posting his contrived list of the top five bowling spells of all-time.
July’s Classic Match showcases a Darryl Kay special from late 2000. Pay a visit to read how he single-handedly turned a match from a lost cause into a sensational victory.
Later this month, Leon Vainu appears in our mind-bogglingly popular ‘Spotlight On....’ feature. Word is that he had it ghost-written for him, due to the fact that you can’t really do tagging on Microsoft Word. Stay tuned.
The 2009-10 season is fast approaching. Shit is about to happen.
GTC."
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Posted by on (40 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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June Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "Brrrr. Winter is cold. What is hot at the moment is otpchargers.com - have you seen how many members we've got these days? Errrr....let's not go into the fact that over 95% of them are fake spam accounts!
Jim Dawson is back with another nonsensical edition of 'Jim Says What He Says'. This month's challenge is to spot the glaring error he has made in his statistical analysis of the Chargers' record against other clubs. EDIT: Sadly for all you OTP trainspotters out there, the error has now been remedied - and you'll never know what it was!! Muah ha ha ha ha....
June's Classic Match rewinds just a few months into the past, as we examine one of the closer battles of the 2008-09 season, a titanic struggle against Birkenhead.
Keep an eye on our popular new feature, 'Spotlight On....', as this month, none other than legendary OTP skipper, Pete Gordon, shares his thoughts on his time in the revered OTP #1 shirt. Look out for it mid-month.
Lots of cricketing action coming up in the next few months - The Twenty20 World Cup and the Ashes loom as potentially the most exciting. If it's full coverage of those events that you're after....you won't get them here.
This is the home of the Chargers. The OTP Chargers."
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Posted by on (38 Reads)
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Mr_Booze
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May Update
Mr_Booze _WRITES "The 2008-09 season is now officially at a close, following the savage OTP End of Season Bash and Cornwall Prizegiving. The dreaded off-season is now upon us, though the depression caused by lack of cricket has been somewhat alleviated by the reincarnation of the OTP Chargers indoor team (even though they play under some ridiculous African name, Zulu Bashers or something....).
You would think that OTP skipper, Jim Dawson, would take the chance to put his feet up over the off-season and have a break from cricket for a few months. Well, no. He has ‘conducted’ what he likes to call an ‘investigation’ about what the best and worst grounds for the Chargers have been over the years. However, I expect that if you actually read the latest ‘Jim Says What He Says’, you’re probably more likely to get a ball-by-ball breakdown of Dawson’s career batting stats or something equally self-promoting.
The insanely popular Classic Match feature has returned, due to the overwhelming volume of emails we have received from interested members of the public demanding its return. This month, we magically time travel back to 2001 and an epic match against Birkenhead that almost resulted in one of the greatest upsets in OTP history. Almost.
Something to watch out for in the middle of this month is a new off-season feature, ‘Spotlight On....’. This month, legendary OTP wicketkeeper, Scott ‘Wolfman’ Washer, shares his thoughts about his time with the Chargers.
The long wait begins now. Use the time wisely – get fit, shave your pubes and start planning your assault on opposition bowlers and/or batsmen for next season. But, however you decide to spend your off-season, make sure your computer spends every spare minute locked onto the world’s number one OTP Chargers website for OTP Chargers stuff – otpchargers.com.
GTC."
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Posted by on (63 Reads)
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